My very dear friend and I were having a heart-to-heart over drinks (you know the kind were you have gotten past social niceties, and the drinks let you TALK) and she mentioned how she couldn’t wrap her head around why I was cooking so much these days. It did really bother her to see me just spend most of my time in cooking and baking, which she said were fine as a hobby but to consider taking baking up as a profession (even if part-time), was something she thought might be a waste of my potential. It seemed like I had gone from being this well-rounded person to a boring domesticated woman who found great joy in growing vegetables, cooking, baking and then feeding people (Ok she didn’t exactly say it like this, I am just extrapolating and maybe even exaggerating).
It set me thinking about the transition and why it has happened. When I think about it I am as surprised at this change as she is. I am not sure when food went from being something I enjoyed to something I began obsessing about. From growing vegetables to getting excited at the sight of vegetable plants, to discussing food at length and (sometimes incoherently) to absolutely wanting my daily dose of food porn, to watching cookery shows (shows I have studiously avoided in the past). Another old acquaintance in a text conversation asked me if my interest in food (inferred from the food pics on FB) was a recent occurrence. Since I absolutely must explain everything I told her it was simply the influence of media (so many cookery shows).
It’s been two weeks since the discussion and I am still thinking about it. Am I wasting my education (or finally putting it to use, since I have a degree in Applied Nutrition), What happens to my MBA? When did I turn into this person? Even as I was/am introspecting, I’ve been reading blogs, watching food pictures, cooking and baking even more. It appears like there is really no hope for me.
Escape? Control? Nesting? Gluttony? Despite so much thought, I haven’t been able to conclusively arrive at the reason for my obsession.Whatever that deep dark reason is, till such time that I delve into the dark recesses of my mind and unearth it, everybody in my life will have to make peace with my current affair and pray that it leads to some fabulous avenues of making money. And just eat what I cook and bake. Is that so hard?